Well, I'm fed up with my life as it is. I live in quiet desparation that someone might nonchalantly show up on my door step and I will have to let them in on my secret...my house is trashed. I didn't plan for us to end up this way and I have several reasons/excuses for it. I will just get those out of the way right now:
-very old house with only 2 real closets
-borderline hoarding personality, nearly the whole family, once we own something it becomes an instant heirloom never to be parted with
-working full-time an living with some seriously work impaired youth
With all that being said yesterday I took a baby step forward - cleaned out and threw away stuff in 3 kitchen drawers. I know not impressive but a start and remember the old adage "a journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step". Well, my journey through a thousand pieces of clutter began with a very concentrated effort on 3 drawers. With this herculean effort I just might make my goal of having the house clean so when I die the kids can let people in with the casseroles and not have to meet them in the driveway for a drop-off.
While this post is somewhat light-hearted it does in fact address a nagging problem I've struggled with since I began working full-time. I have to work, I'm blessed to have a job to go to, I'm blessed to work where most of my children are all day but I still feel guilty. I feel like every minute I don't work I just want to spend time with my favorite peeps. Work together you say, usually ends up badly, and I'll leave it at that.
I love the Savior so much because He is all about do-overs and second chances. The atonement is all about being able to change at any age. I have to remind myself of that every single day. I can't express what hope that gives me even when I'm having a hopeless day.